相談をする

The grammar is very straightforward. You use the particle に to mark the person you are talking to. For example, 友だちに相談をする means you are consulting a friend. You can use it for big life choices. You can also use it for small daily dilemmas. It is a very versatile phrase. Just remember that the person you ask is the 'target' of your action.

Use this when you feel stuck. Use it at work when a project gets complicated. Use it with your partner when choosing a new apartment. It is perfect for texting a friend when you have boy troubles. Even at a restaurant, you might 'consult' your friend about what to order. It creates a sense of teamwork and shared responsibility.

Do not use this for basic facts. If you want to know the time, do not 'consult' someone. That is just a 質問 (question). Also, do not use it if you have already decided. Consulting someone implies you are open to their ideas. If you just want to announce something, use 話す (to talk) instead. Using it for trivial things might make you sound a bit dramatic.

Japan is a culture that deeply values consensus. This is called 和 (wa) or harmony. Making decisions alone can be seen as risky or even rude. In Japanese offices, there is a famous rule called ほうれんそう (Hou-Ren-So). It stands for Report, Contact, and Consult. 相談 is the 'So' in that rule. It is a vital social lubricant that keeps relationships smooth.

You will often hear 相談がある which means 'I have something to discuss.' This is the classic 'We need to talk' opener. Another one is 相談に乗る, which means to give advice to someone else. If you want to be polite, you can say ご相談があります. Adding that ご makes it sound much more professional. It is a great way to show respect to a boss.