患难与共

You can use this as a descriptive phrase for a relationship or as a verb-like commitment. You might say, 'We are 患难与共 brothers,' or 'We will 患难与共 forever.' It usually functions as a predicate (stating a fact about a group) or an attributive (describing a noun). It’s a heavy phrase, so use it when you want to show deep appreciation or serious commitment.

This is perfect for high-stakes emotional moments. Use it during a wedding toast to describe a couple who survived long-distance or health scares. Use it in a business meeting when a company finally turns a profit after years of struggle to thank the original team. It’s also great for texting a best friend who helped you through a breakup or a job loss. It tells them, 'You're not just a friend; you're a comrade.'

Don't use this for trivial things! If you and a coworker both got stuck in a five-minute elevator delay, saying you are 患难与共 sounds incredibly dramatic (unless you're being very sarcastic). Avoid using it with people you barely know. It implies a history of shared suffering. Using it on a first date might actually scare someone away because it sounds like you're expecting a tragedy soon!

This idiom has roots in the 'Records of the Grand Historian' (史记), written over 2,000 years ago. In Chinese culture, the concept of 义 (yì) or 'righteous loyalty' is huge. True friendship isn't measured by how many drinks you have together at a party, but by who stays when the party is over and the bill is due. It’s a pillar of traditional brotherhood and martial arts stories.

You’ll often hear 同甘共苦 (tóng gān gòng kǔ), which means 'sharing sweetness and bitterness.' While similar, 患难与共 focuses much more on the 'hardship' side of the equation. Another one is 同舟共济 (tóng zhōu gòng jì), which literally means 'crossing the river in the same boat,' emphasizing teamwork during a specific crisis.