change is not set in stone

You usually use this phrase when discussing schedules or rules. Use it to lower the pressure in a conversation. You can say, "The meeting is at 2 PM, but it's not set in stone." This tells your friend that you are open to suggestions. It often follows a specific detail like a date, a price, or a location. It works perfectly as a follow-up sentence to show you are being reasonable.

Use it when you want to sound cooperative. It is great for work projects where details might shift. Use it when planning a dinner with a friend who is always late. It is also helpful when you are giving someone a rough estimate. For example, if you think a job will cost $50, add this phrase. It protects you if the price changes later. It makes you sound like a relaxed and easy-going person.

Do not use this for things that are actually permanent. If a law is passed, it is usually set in stone. Avoid using it for very serious life events like a wedding date that is tomorrow. It might make you sound flaky or unreliable if used too often. Also, do not use it if you are the boss and you want people to follow a strict deadline. It gives people an excuse to be late!

This expression comes from ancient times when laws were literally carved into stone tablets. Think of the Ten Commandments or the Code of Hammurabi. Back then, if it was in stone, it was the law forever. In modern Western culture, we value being busy but also being flexible. We like to have a plan, but we hate feeling trapped by it. This phrase reflects our love for "keeping our options open."

You will often hear the positive version: "That is set in stone." This means the decision is final and you cannot argue. Sometimes people say carved in stone or written in stone. They all mean the exact same thing. In very casual settings, someone might just say, "It's not permanent," but not set in stone sounds much more natural and idiomatic.