C1 Expression Neutral 3 min read

By the by

Academic discourse marker used to connect ideas

Literally: Beside the beside

Use it to pivot to a side-note when you want to sound polite and slightly more sophisticated.

In 15 Seconds

  • A sophisticated way to say 'by the way' during a conversation.
  • Used to introduce a side-note or a tangential thought smoothly.
  • Adds a touch of literary flair to your spoken or written English.

Meaning

It is a smooth way to introduce a side-note or a new topic that isn't the main focus of your conversation. Think of it as a slightly more elegant or 'vintage' version of saying 'by the way.'

Key Examples

3 of 6
1

Chatting with a coworker about a project

The report looks great! By the by, did you see the email about the office party?

The report looks great! Incidentally, did you see the email about the office party?

💼
2

Texting a friend about weekend plans

I'll be there at six. By the by, should I bring some snacks?

I'll be there at six. By the way, should I bring some snacks?

🤝
3

A formal academic email to a professor

Thank you for the feedback. By the by, I have attached the revised bibliography.

Thank you for the feedback. Also, I have attached the revised bibliography.

👔
🌍

Cultural Background

The phrase originated in the 1600s and became a hallmark of refined British conversation. It reflects a linguistic era where transitions were more decorative and rhythmic. Today, it is often used by English speakers who want to sound slightly more sophisticated or whimsical than the average person.

💡

The 'Vintage' Charm

Using `by the by` instead of `by the way` makes you sound more articulate. It's a small change that leaves a big impression on native speakers.

⚠️

Don't overdo it

If you use it five times in one meeting, you might sound like you're trying too hard to be fancy. Save it for that one perfect transition.

In 15 Seconds

  • A sophisticated way to say 'by the way' during a conversation.
  • Used to introduce a side-note or a tangential thought smoothly.
  • Adds a touch of literary flair to your spoken or written English.

What It Means

By the by is a transition phrase. It helps you pivot from one topic to another. It signals that what you are about to say is an extra thought. It is not the main point of the discussion. You use it to bring up something you just remembered. It functions exactly like by the way. However, it carries a slightly more sophisticated or literary tone. It makes your speech sound a bit more polished. It is like a gentle nudge to the listener's attention.

How To Use It

You usually place this phrase at the very beginning of a sentence. It acts as a bridge between two different ideas. You can also use it in the middle of a sentence with commas. For example, you might be talking about a project. Then you remember a lunch meeting. You would say, By the by, are we still meeting at noon? It keeps the flow of conversation natural. It prevents the new topic from sounding too abrupt or random.

When To Use It

Use it when you want to sound a bit more charming or intellectual. It works great in emails to colleagues. It is perfect for dinner parties or social gatherings. Use it when the new topic is a lighthearted side-note. It is excellent for adding a 'P.S.' feel to a spoken sentence. You will often hear it in British English or from people who enjoy literature. It adds a touch of class to your everyday English vocabulary.

When NOT To Use It

Avoid using it during a very heated argument. It sounds too calm and polite for a high-stress fight. Do not use it in extremely formal legal documents. In those cases, incidentally or furthermore are better choices. If you are in a huge rush, just use anyway. By the by requires a bit of a relaxed pace. It can feel out of place in a fast-paced emergency. Don't overuse it in one conversation, or you might sound like a Victorian novelist.

Cultural Background

This phrase has deep roots in 18th and 19th-century English literature. Writers like Jane Austen or Charles Dickens might have used it. The 'by' refers to something that is 'secondary' or 'on the side.' Over time, it became a staple of 'gentlemanly' or educated speech. Today, it feels slightly nostalgic. It is like wearing a vintage watch; it is functional but has character. It suggests the speaker is well-read and thoughtful about their language.

Common Variations

The most common variation is definitely by the way. In very formal writing, you might see incidentally. In casual slang, people might just say oh, also. Some older speakers might say by the bye with an 'e' at the end. They mean the exact same thing. In texting, people rarely abbreviate by the by. They usually stick to BTW for by the way. Using the full by the by in a text shows you are being intentional.

Usage Notes

This phrase sits in the 'sweet spot' between casual and formal. It is perfect for professional emails where you want to maintain a friendly yet sophisticated tone.

💡

The 'Vintage' Charm

Using `by the by` instead of `by the way` makes you sound more articulate. It's a small change that leaves a big impression on native speakers.

⚠️

Don't overdo it

If you use it five times in one meeting, you might sound like you're trying too hard to be fancy. Save it for that one perfect transition.

💬

The British Connection

While used globally, this phrase is a favorite in the UK. Using it there will help you blend in with locals who appreciate traditional idioms.

Examples

6
#1 Chatting with a coworker about a project
💼

The report looks great! By the by, did you see the email about the office party?

The report looks great! Incidentally, did you see the email about the office party?

Used to transition from work talk to social talk.

#2 Texting a friend about weekend plans
🤝

I'll be there at six. By the by, should I bring some snacks?

I'll be there at six. By the way, should I bring some snacks?

Adds a polite inquiry to a confirmed plan.

#3 A formal academic email to a professor
👔

Thank you for the feedback. By the by, I have attached the revised bibliography.

Thank you for the feedback. Also, I have attached the revised bibliography.

Connects the main thanks to a secondary action.

#4 A humorous observation during a walk
😄

It's a lovely day. By the by, your dog is currently eating my shoelaces.

It's a lovely day. Oh, and your dog is eating my shoelaces.

Uses the polite phrase to contrast with a funny, chaotic situation.

#5 A heartfelt letter to a family member
💭

I miss you all. By the by, I finally started that painting you suggested.

I miss you all. By the way, I finally started that painting you suggested.

Introduces a personal update in a gentle way.

#6 Ordering at a cafe
😊

I'll take a latte. By the by, do you have any oat milk left?

I'll take a latte. Also, do you have any oat milk left?

A polite way to add a specific request to an order.

Test Yourself

Choose the best phrase to complete the transition to a side-note.

We should finish the slides tonight. ___, have you heard back from the client?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: By the by

`By the by` is the correct expression used to introduce a related but secondary question.

Which word is a more formal academic synonym for 'by the by'?

The study concludes that sleep is vital. ___, it notes that caffeine can disrupt this cycle.

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: Incidentally

`Incidentally` is the formal equivalent of `by the by` often used in academic writing.

🎉 Score: /2

Visual Learning Aids

Formality of Transition Phrases

Informal

Used with close friends or in quick texts.

Anyway...

Neutral

Standard conversational bridge.

By the way...

Polished

Slightly more elegant or literary.

By the by...

Formal

Professional or academic discourse.

Incidentally...

Where to use 'By the by'

By the by
📧

Professional Email

Adding a small reminder to a boss.

🍷

Dinner Party

Sharing a quick anecdote between courses.

🎓

Academic Discussion

Connecting two related research points.

Casual Catch-up

Asking about a mutual friend.

Frequently Asked Questions

10 questions

Yes, they are essentially synonyms. By the by is just slightly more formal or old-fashioned.

You can, but it might look a bit formal. It is better for longer texts where you want to sound thoughtful.

Both are correct. By the by is more common today, but by the bye is the older spelling.

Usually, yes. It can also be used as a noun phrase, like That is just a by the by, meaning it is a minor point.

It is understood in America but used less frequently than in British English. It sounds quite 'proper' to American ears.

It can be used in academic discourse to connect ideas, but incidentally is more standard for formal papers.

It's not recommended. Its polite tone might come across as sarcastic or weirdly calm during a confrontation.

The word 'by' once meant 'a side path.' So, by the by literally means 'along the side path' of a conversation.

Only if you use it constantly. Used once or twice, it just sounds like you have a great vocabulary.

Not really. It is meant to introduce something new, so it usually keeps the conversation going for a bit longer.

Related Phrases

By the way

The most common way to introduce a side-note.

Incidentally

A more formal way to introduce a related but secondary topic.

As an aside

Used to signal that you are briefly departing from the main topic.

Speaking of which

Used when the new topic is directly triggered by something just mentioned.

In passing

To mention something briefly without going into detail.

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